Since I was a child, I’ve felt there was something significant I was meant to do, something beyond what I was doing. At times the feeling would take over, and I’d split between despair and hope that one day I’d discover my dreams.
Flash forward, I’m 35 and still working towards the expectations of my childhood self. I’ve since graduated high school, university, and college. All this happened despite what my middle school principal told my parents. In his defence, he was working within a broken model of public education.
Over the years, my parents spent a small fortune sending me to a private school, but that was also a turning point. At 12 I couldn’t read or spell, but the private school had different methodologies that worked for me, I was lucky. Onward to high school, I was able to succeed based on my expectations. I got good marks and was admitted to all the universities I applied for.
Everyone told me the first semester at university would be stressful, and I would suffer but come out stronger. Those words affected me. My first semester wasn’t too hard, and I did all my work and got decent marks. Unfortunately, due to these false expectations school wasn’t as scary as I expected. Afterwards, I didn’t have as much of a will to try so hard.
Schooling is Over, What Is Next
At this point, life became a more difficult because there was no longer a defined path. It was a matter of my choices, and I didn’t care very much. At some point, I got a job at a call centre and stayed longer than anyone would’ve expected, myself included. My brother got mad at me and told my parents I was wasting my life, he was right.
So I got the idea to teach English in another country, I quit my job and went to Korea. Life was exciting again, and I was forced to find myself. Through that, I overcame my shyness and became more outgoing. Afterwards, I took a trip to India, and my brother warned me ‘Be careful, you can be a too fearless.’
On my return, I went to college and learned something interesting and useful: how to make websites. I was an excellent student and got superb marks with relative ease and little effort. But I wanted something more, my childhood dream was back, begging for more.
College leads to a mediocre job, and after a few months, I get laid off. I find myself looking for another job thinking I could do some amazing if given a chance.
On to another job, five years in, I’m still waiting for a chance to show my real potential and take a great leap. Life seems to teach us to wait, but instead, we should leap into new things and make a better life for ourselves.
Now Is The Time To Do Something
A few months back, I decided to take my childhood dreams serious. Since then I’ve dedicated myself to writing. I’ve written a short book and have been writing articles for my website and medium.
I’ve also gone about learning the business side of writing and tried to do some marketing.
The point is, that life is a series of ups and downs. There are times when we are doing all that we can, so we are continually improving and moving forward. Then there are down times, where we feel we have lost our way.
During these downtimes, we get time to redefine our direction and figure out what we need to do. These times give us a chance to see where we need to go next. It also gives us a chance to refind some of our momenta again.
The challenge is to realize that when you are down, it means you can only go up. Also, when you are up, there is a chance that you could go down. But both directions are a necessary part of life, and something you must go through.
The most significant thing you can do is be ready for what comes next. With this knowledge, you can prepare for the next phase, whatever it may be.
If you are up, you need to be sure your motivations are in the right place. You need to build savings and be ready for a crash. If you are down, you need to figure out how to get back up again. That could mean learning new skills, changing jobs or starting a business.
The best thing you can do is aim to be amazing. If you are heading in all the right direction, you can always handle what comes.